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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24565240">...how i’m feeling now</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/FurryGohan/pseuds/FurryGohan'>FurryGohan</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Timothée Chalamet - Fandom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 03:14:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,915</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24565240</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/FurryGohan/pseuds/FurryGohan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s Y/N’s first day at a private boarding school somewhere in northern Italy. You were hoping to have a smooth first day, but something unexpected passes your way...</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Timothée Chalamet/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Evolution</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>January 9th You walk into the school building. It smells like piss. ew. You had been on the receiving end of a few golden showers before, which is how you identified the peculiar smell. You were used to it. To pee. You loved pee. Pee was something you could not live without. Sometimes, you would tickle your father’s penis during his sleep so it would pee on you and sometimes you felt like drinking it and other times you felt like showering in it, either way, it was pee, and you loved pee. You pull your schedule out that you printed from home. Your first class is CP math 3. ugh. you hated math. You had done some math problems before, which is why you hated math. Sometimes at your old school, you would do math equations on the board when the teacher asked you to. Sometimes it was parabolas and other times it was y=mx+b. Either way, it was math and you hated math. You hear the bell ring and curse under your breath, you needed to hurry to class. You ran to class, you got detention because if you noticed this is a M/F fanfic and obviously you’re straight and what do all straight people have in common? They all walk slow. So you got to class even later than you should have gotten to class before then. You open the door and notice everyone staring at you, even the teacher was staring at you. You were so nervous you could’ve just. But you didn’t. Because you’re stronger than that is why you didn’t do it. You find an empty seat near another seat. You sit down. The teacher starts explaining ruled about calculators. You zone out. 1 Hour later you zone back in and it is time go to your next class. You pull out your schedule. Your next class is creative writing. You get up and go into the hallway but first you need to put some stuff in your locker. You go to your locker. You open your locker. You put your math work in your locker. You close your locker. You turn to start walking but you’re suddenly bumped on your shoulder. You turn to see what bumped you on your shoulder. It was a guy. The guy was tall and skinny. His cheeks were sunken into his face and his jawline pointed to form a perfect chin at the tip of his chin, forming a chin. His hair was dark, dark like black and like the night. You were a night time person so you like the night. He was also white. He turned and said "sorry whats your name?" you say "my name is Y/N." He says "Well you know what they say, weirdness is originality." <em>Holy cow. </em>He thinks you’re originality. "Whats your name you say?" </p><p> </p><p>"Timothée. Timothée Chardonnay. Or at least thats what they call me. It’s actually Chalamet ."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"Wow" you say. "My last name Banovic. My family is from Bosnia but mainly Europe, so its pronounced bAn-OH-vEEch. Most people say Broncovik but no it’s not how you say that, they’re probably just not educated about it anyway." Timothée smiles at you and says "Your brown eyes are so brown..." <em>triple shoot.  </em>This guy is good. Really good. "Hey, you mind if I ask for yournumber? you’re like kinda hot and I would like to get to know you better?" Your inner angel fluttered. "O-Of c-c-course! Here!" "Thanks! I’ll text you. See you later Y/N." </p><p> </p><p>You had butterflies in your larvae. You were pretty sure what you were gonna be writing about in creative writing today.</p><p> </p><p>You come home and take off your shoes at the front of the door where the door is at the front of the house on your street. You immediately run upstairs and hop onto your bed, checking your phone to see if you’ve received a message from Timothée. You haven’t. You were pretty tired from the and so, you fell asleep on your bed...</p><p> </p><p>You wake up. You check your clock next to your bed thats on the dresser near your bed next to the bed thats on the dresser near the bed that says 19:33 p.m. <em>Damn. </em>You. You checked your phone and see that you have received a message from an unknown number, it must be Timothée. It reads:</p><p> </p><p>"Hey! It’s Tim here. Just wondering if I could come over tonight to your house on your street where your house is on the street of your house in your street of your house to study together tonight in your house on your street tonight together? :)"</p><p> </p><p>You start to type</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah ofc come over 2nite! I’d love to see you again tonight at my house on my street tonight! See you there and then tonight!"</p><p> </p><p>About half an hour later you get a doorbell on your knock. You open the door and it’s Timothée. You take him up to your room where your room is in the house on your street where your house is on the street of your house where it is on the street. You turn to close the door behind him then you turn again and notice something odd in his pants where his penis should be. </p><p> </p><p>"😰" he says. "Shhhh." you said. no need. you already know where this is going in the house on your street where your house is that is in the street of your house. You take his belt off and drop down his pants and underwear. It’s pale, and long. It has foreskin and is a little pasty. He’s pretty skinny, and so is his cock so ig that theory of skinny men with hung horse cocks has been detheorey-ed. Nevertheless, you take him in your mouth and he tastes like strawberries on a summer evenin’. You look up at him and he looks down at you. <em>wœh. </em>you just got butterflies in your <em><b>pussy</b>. </em>Your <em><b>pussy</b>. </em>He stops your sucking and places you on the bed. He was looking at your body. You became self conscious because you were self conscious about your body. Especially your weight. He took his cock and lined it up with your naked body’s pussy hole. He curled his hands into fists and started punching you, specifically your stomach and love handle areas, trying to thin you up, make you skinny and fleshless like him. He wanted you to feel the pain of his tightly stretched skin and his thin and scrawny bones. He didn’t drink enough milk as a child, and now he pays the price for it. You yell out in pain and you hear footsteps coming up the stairs. Your mother opens the door and watches as Timothée savagely beats and bruises you. Your vision goes feint, and you can feel yourself slipping away into white hot pleasure...</p><p> </p><p>You wake up. "What day is it?" you ask. It’s January 12th says the. What had happened? Did you pass out? What had happened? You passed out. You thought back to Timothée and  you looked down. You couldn’t see where your stomach and hips were. You got up and looked into the mirror. You cant recognize yourself</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Adaption</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Y/N tries to adjust to your new life and body</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>AH AH AHHHHHHHHH FFFFFffffffffuckkk...</p><p>You just had your first ever orgasm in your new body. Not only that, but you also squirted. You. Always. Creamed.<br/><br/></p><p>You noticed that ever since you got your new body, youve been having trouble getting off as much. You put your vibrator to rest on the nightstand next to your bed. You got up, walked to the bathroom in your house on the street where your house is on a street with your house in a street with your house and you turned on the faucet. water comes out the faucet. your put your hands in the water coming from the faucet in your house. You turn the faucet off. you grab the towel laying on the sink next to the faucet where you ran your hands under when water was coming out. Your phone dings and your heart drops. It’s Timothée. your heart <em>drops</em>. He sent you a text that says "i sent someone to drop off a package at your door. It has something special in it and it should be there in about</p><p> </p><p>what could possibly be in the box package? your heart <em>drops</em>. All the sudden, you walk to your room. You put on some panties to put on yourself but....... ever since you lost all that weight none of your clothes have fat you. your panties drop to the floor like your <em>heart</em>. your heart <em>drops</em>. Your door bell rings and you open the door to find a package with no one there with the package on your street. you take in the package to your home and inside it is a leather gimp. what is this"? you text Timothée "WTF!!!!!!!!!!"</p><p>"Dont worry baby girl... its for tomorrow night ;) xoxo (; oxox"</p><p>"whats tomorrow night you faggot" you .say</p><p>"now thats no way to talk" he snaps</p><p> </p><p>whatever. youre mad.</p><p> </p><p>before you can tell it, it is tomorrow night already. You look at the gimp. "Put it on says timothée" you cant make me you say and he punches you... did u just lose more weight? you put on the gimp like youre told to do and put on the gimp. youre so accentuated in the gimp youre actually kinda like actually kinda this looks not too bad on me but where are we go you ask and timothée already knows what youre thinking so he tells you. "we are going to swingers party. but.......... there is a twist" what is the twist you <em>wonder</em>? what is the twist you say "the twist is twisty like a twisty twister twist. it is a hardcore twist bDSM party twist. ill be going as your pet" Timothée pulls something out of his duffle bag and its a dog mask <strong><em>woah </em></strong>is that a dog mask you wonder "its a dog mask" oh.</p><p> </p><p>you get to the party and you see all these people youve never seen before. you get out the car with Timothée on a leash and on all fours. hes dressed like a pup. you walk in the party and see all these people youve never seen before. the house flashes epilepsy red systematically mechanically from the light machine and as you walk a mile with timothée in your loubuitons, you witness a lot. there are people on on sex swings, mostly girls, getting fucked, and, people mummified on their stomachs with just their ass area uncovered, as people thrust massive dildos into their poor little holes, ripping through their anal cavity and tearing the soft, tender, pink, now blood red, muscle inside. Those must be the dragon dildos youve heard about. You didnt realize that you had stopped to watch the scene and timmy barks at you "bark!" so you keep it moving.</p><p> </p><p>Eventually soon enough after a while of walking quite far through the house, you come to an empty spot. Everyone around you looks at you in a circle around u and youre like <em>honey mustard</em>! Timothée looks at you and growls with a sneer under his dog mask with a scowl sneer you can tell that this wont be pretty, you think youre getting pretty used to your body now. Your maneuvers and movements have been enhanced by a considerable amount that and you are also the skinniest at the party, everyone is in shock... or is it awe. you step up with tim onto the spot stage highlighted by the spotlight that was shining on it with light. everyone is looking at you and youre so confused but no one can see that because of ur gimp mask suits mask you notice that there issomethingstandingnearyouandsoyoulookatittoseewhatitis. its a paddle, gag, heroine syringe, lemon juice and, a lighter and two wax candles. Timothée gets up from all fours and youre like what are you doing you dog get back down! all the sudden you feel a strong knock on the back of your head where your skull is and you black out...you come to and the lights are still flashing red like when they were flashing red when you came in so youre still at the party now you know that at least. you hear</p><p>people mumbling in the back, your vision is blurry but you can make out the figure standing around and near you to your front. its Timothée. . . of course it is, you try to move but youre able to tell that youre tied down onto a table and you look to your left and see people standing around you so eager to see, you look to your straight and you notice that your feet are exposed. you lie your head back and see that there is a tv, on the ceiling and its playing a tape but you can tell its playing something on repeat so you watch it and its a video of a woman in a gimp being striked in the back of the head with a baseball bat, and blood going everywhere, its you, and its playing on repeat, you look up and see that timothée has an ice scraper in his hands and in his other hand he is pouring lemon juice onto it, he sets it down and comes to where your head lies and uses black duck to tape your head down so that you cant move, you try to move your arms but you cant, then, you realize that you are mummified and only your feet and head are exposed. Timothée walks back to where he set down the scraper and starts to scrape the bottom of your feet with the lemon juice on it, it hurts so bad and you can tell that your feet are starting to streak with blood, but also that something is coming and falling off of your feet, but, you cant figure out what it is, he scrapes and scrapes and scrapes for what seems to be 4 minutes and he stops, you cant feel your feet and they are scraped and streaked with blood, with lemon juice to make it sting even more, the crowd cheers watching the scene intently patiently waiting to see what happens next, next, Timothée picks up the syringe with the heroin inside and flicks it to get it ready. He takes the syringe and impales the bottom of your right foot with it and the drug enters your bloodstream instantaneously, your eyes start to lower and you feel nauseous from the pain and blood loss but the drug is keeping you awake, timothée stops injecting it about 3 quarters of the way and takes out the needle and grabs your left foot, and he picks your middle toe and stabs it with the needle and injects the rest of the drug into your toe, he walks up to your head and you can see him raise his arm, he jets his hand down and skewers your forehead with the syringe and leaves it there, he walks to get the paddle and you start to cry and pain, he comes back and flicks the needle out of your skin and once again raises his hand and hurls the paddle at your face, smaking you with such intensity that you can feel your nose break and it starts to bleed as your face turns red, he beats you again with the paddle until your face is a swollen, bloody, purple mess, and once again your vision blurs, he drops the paddle and goes to where your boobs are and rips open the wrapping and exposing your tender tits. he takes your nipples and pulls on them, he sticks his fingers in the middle to try and push the insides down, he does this for some time, eventually for so long that your nipples are swollen purple and the insides are beveled and sunken in, he walks away for a second and you pay attention to the video of you being hit in the back off the head. the blood, the drug and the pain that you are experiencing is so overwhelming and you dont think you stay conscious much longer, and you wonder if youll even be able to stay alive at this rate... god Timothée is ruthless... timmy walks back with the candles and the lighter, he sticks the wax candles into your lowered and recessed nipples, and lights them. you can faintly feel the heat above your titties draw closer to you, you dont even feel the melting wax drip onto your body, as you are too numb from everything that has happened, and you can feel yourself reach closer and closer to heavenly vaginal release....</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Yo, I never fucked Wayne, I never fucked Drake<br/>On my life, man, fuck's sake<br/>If I did, I'd ménage with 'em and let 'em eat my ass like a cupcake<br/>My man full, he just ate, I don't duck nobody but tape<br/>Yeah, that was a setup for a punchline on duct tape<br/>Wo-wo-wo-worried 'bout if my butt fake<br/>Worry 'bout y'all n****s, us straight<br/>Th-these girls are my sons, Jo-Jon &amp; Kate Plus Eight<br/>When I walk in, sit up straight, I don't give a fuck if I was late<br/>Dinner with my man on a G5 is my idea of a update<br/>Hut-hut one, hut-hut two, big titties, big butt too<br/>Fu-fuck with them real n***s<br/>Who don't tell n****s what they up to<br/>Had to show bitches where the top is<br/>Ri-ring finger where the rock is<br/>The-these hoes couldn't test me<br/>Even if their name was Pop Quiz<br/>Bad bitches who I fuck with<br/>Ma-ma-mad bitches we don't fuck with<br/>I don't fuck with them chickens unless they last name is Cutlet<br/>Let it soak in, like seasoning<br/>And tell them bitches blow me, Lance Stephenson</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Extinction</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Y/N recovers from the intense scene</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>you open your eyes. your eyes are blurry. the first thing you notice is that you have a big fat fucking headache so fat it could be featured, as your eyes try to adjust to your vision, you can make out with timothée chalahay but you dont bc ur like a lil mad at him! 🤬. your eyes adjust to your eyesight and you see the grass that you thonk is there you touch it yup its grass you are laying down so therefore you decide to stand up you stand up but woah no you cant youre in pain like when chris brown beat badgalriri 🤜🏽👩🏿. youre not sure why but you accept it from the accepting accepter thats accepts the accepting accepts accepter woah like gabbie hannah you climbed out of your head and watched your pussy implode a thought w/o a thong ought to be the shot that takes a load out of tim’s balls your brain is poison and youre searching for the antidote but everytime you search your defenses say no, wœuh. anyway, </p><p>you black out</p><p>when you return to consciousness you find someone sitting over your head its tim WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO ME YOU WET CUNT I COULD SMELL YOU FROM A MILE AWAY!???? timothée takes a bat yo your face several times and you feel a tooth or teeth fell fall out, you black out.</p><p>you awake again GRR GAK! this time youre in a car in the passengers seat of a what seems to be a car you seem to be okay but you seem to be hurt to so you seem confused so you seem to look to your write and there seems to be a seemingly seemed timothée chalulha sauce seem! him again. no not this time where are we going you say he looks at you and says youre not skinny enough to speak to me you dont know my pain no you cant KNOW it you will never no youre never compared to me so fat youre still so fat after everything ive done to you youre still fat im fucking going to make you so skinny no matter what it takes nothing will stop me! wow. that was a lot you feel really bad for timothée he has never meaned to hurt you but accidentally did because he didnt mean it :( </p><p>after a few, the car stops you say timmy where are we he saids well come on lets go see where we have voyaged to from and you smile and agree willingly and desperately so. you walk to a what seems to he a cliff on the side of the mountain you see its so gorgeous you can see all the city (youre above saratoga, united states rn.) and wow its breathe ceasing. wow. wow. wow. wow. w. o. w. wow. wo. w. w. ow. wow. this is amazing! you see that Rimothée has brought a woven basket and a blanket whyd you call him rimothée well hes great at rimming seemingly allegedly seemed so. he lays the blanket out and buts the basket on reveal pee bee and jays no not pbandj literal pee, bee, and jays. but those are for him... so whats for you on this little picnick? well do you remember when tim scraped off all that stuff from the bottom of your feet turns out it was dead skin and he kept it in a jar for you for this day for now aw sweet he pulls out the jar and he kept it in the sun so the skin melted and he poured the cumcocktion (yes it had some spare cum in it to help liquify the consistency of the consister) in between two loafs of hardened pee encrusted yeast (aka bread with pee in it btw) it looked so delish. he hands it to you and you grin with a big smile and put it in your mouth but oop! before you take a bite you cant forget the topping! you stick your hand down to your pussy crevices and swipe up some aged discharge and rub it all over your teeth to keep that white gleam. then you tchomp into it and its soooo good so homey and warm and homefood comfort food really. then you open your eyes and wetcuntothée is staring at you "what. you say" you takes your head into his hands and you smile. he raises his thumbs and thrusts them into your eyes GOWJING your eyes, AÏE AÏE! you exclaim to him "Why?" you say he doesnt respond. he starts to punch you and kick you in the crotch and the face you have no tears left to cry, youre in a state of mind, but you cant stay here all the time, its time for you to get out once and for all. so you start to fight and kick and throw it back and you two struggle for dear victory sweet life you two eventually wrestle all the way and youre very near to the edge of the cusp of the tip of the mountain! tim gets on top and squeezes your head and headbutts you continuously youre about to go unconscious but all the sudden, something comes over you, a new will to live; christianity, rushes through your veins and you gather the strength of god through out your body and center it in your arms and you pUSH timothée off of you and he screams and yells and screeches and falls into the ocean below yall. good. you walk back to the car and start it.</p><p>7 months later</p><p>you look in the mirror and take off your eyepatches you cant see your body but it feels extremely thin and grt thinner by the day. you decide to go to the doctor and they take your blood pressure. turns you had semen flowing in your blood. timothée happened to have been the deity of gauntiness and so his semen had this special property than would thin anything to an extreme point like wendy williams. this will eventually make the infected so thin that they will eventually will be so skinny no one will be able to see them as if theyre invisible and they will cease to exist. so you feel like its time to visit lil timmy a visit to his grave. </p><p>you find it and dig up his kasqit and open it and see that the water and wasted away his body even more and so and spit on his face ferociously aggresive-like. bye you dumb old cunt.</p><p> </p><p>Fin</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hope you enjoyed this story! it came from a really personal place and im so glad i got to share my story with everyone!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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